"And who is my neighbor?"

There’s a story Jesus told that is among the most poignant and also the most ignored. In Luke 10:25-37, a teacher of the Law decided to test Jesus. He asked Jesus, ““Teacher, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?” (Luke 10:25 NKJV)

Jesus, naturally, answered his question with another: “What does the Law say?” The teacher correctly told Jesus, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, and with all your mind,’ and ‘your neighbor as yourself'” (Luke 10:27 NKJV).

“You have answered rightly,” Jesus said. “Do this and you will live” (28).

But the teacher, seeking to justify himself, responded, “And who is my neighbor?” (29)

The command we don’t want to keep

This is the question we’re still asking—that we’re always asking. And, honestly, I don’t think our reasons are any different than the teacher of the Law who spoke with Jesus. There is something unsettling about the greatest commandment—especially the notion of loving our neighbors as ourselves. Unless we’re particularly virtuous, our first instinct is to always say, “But surely not that one.”

I’ll spare you an exhaustive list. We all have one. After all, this is a sin that shows no partiality.¹ It transcends theological, sociological, economic, and political boundaries and spectrums. We are all guilty of it. In each of our hearts, there is someone—or some group—that we are prone to despise. Someone we refuse to acknowledge as our neighbors.

But that is exactly who they are: Our neighbors. The very people Scripture calls us to love.

And our current cultural moment doesn’t help with this, as it seeks to divide and radicalize us. To keep us from being able to talk to one another. To keep us angry and afraid.

Sometimes, there are good reasons for the anger we feel. It is right to be offended by evil, especially when it is loudly proclaimed as good. God stands against all who oppress the poor (Psalm 103:6). Pursuing wealth and power for personal gain is equally offensive (Proverbs 23:4-5; Matthew 6:24; 1 Timothy 6:10).

But God doesn’t need us—or even want us—to be angry all the time. Nor do our neighbors, even those who perpetrate it. We were not made to bear that kind of burden.

Love your neighbor (even when it hurts)

This is key to the parable’s message. When Jesus tells the teacher to be like the Samaritan, who cared for the beaten Jewish man at great personal cost, he meant it. Being a neighbor—especially in this particular moment—is costly.

It challenges our innate prejudices and cautions us to maintain self-control, even in the midst of chaos, knowing that the power of the tongue to set the world aflame is all too real (James 3:6). Likewise, just as Proverbs 26:5 calls us to sometimes answer a fool according to his folly, we must also speak the truth about the wickedness we see, especially when it comes from within our “teams.” And it calls us to pray for those who make us bristle,² handing them over to the only One who can change their hearts—and to change ours, too.

“‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength. This is the first commandment,” Jesus said. And the second, he said, is like it: “‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself’” (Mark 12:30-31 NKJV). No other commandment is greater than these.

“Who is my neighbor?” We already know. We may just not want to admit it.

Let’s seek to love them with God’s help and in his power, even when it hurts.