Is there a better way to respond when sin is exposed?

When a person’s sin is exposed, it is simultaneously tragic and a good thing. The tragic aspect is that evil of any sort has been perpetrated. People have been hurt. Trust has been violated. Harm has been done. Sin is never victimless because it doesn’t exist in a vacuum, something we’re reminded of every time the sin of a Christian with any degree of notoriety is exposed.

The good, of course, is that exposure brings sin into the light. This is true whether its exposure was motivated by inward conviction or prompted by outside forces. In the best circumstances, it leads to genuine repentance on the perpetrator’s part. It challenges us to consider our life and doctrine closely (1 Timothy 4:16). And it provides opportunities for those who have been harmed to find help and healing—and for those of us walking alongside them to show both empathy and compassion.

I care about all of these. I hope you do too. But one of these in particular—how the exposure of sin challenges us—weighs heavily on me, especially as it relates to caring for those who have been harmed.

Avoid well-meaning but misguided words

Whenever someone we respect’s sin is exposed, what is the first thing people do? In social media land, the tendency is to offer up a well-intentioned message that goes something like this:

Such tragic news. Praying for those involved. But for the grace of God, we’re all just one choice away from doing the same. “Therefore let him who thinks he stands take heed lest he fall” (1 Corinthians 10:12).

The more jaded among us might struggle to see anything well-intended in this message, but there is something good present. When people sin, we should pray. It is good and right to do so. The same is true with awareness of our need for God’s grace and not being presumptuous about our personal holiness.

But how we frame our awareness of our need for grace makes our well-intentioned statements misguided (at best).

When a public Christian’s sin is exposed—and specifically sexual sin—it’s usually done using coded language like moral failure. But this ambiguous term obscures the nature of such sins, so that we don’t know if a person is guilty of adultery, an abuse of power, or an even more serious crime. (Whether we need to know is another issue.)

When we offer up a “but for the grace of God go I” type statement, we don’t really know what we’re empathizing with. We are empathizing from ignorance—and potentially with the wrong person. But what happens when the details eventually come to light, and they’re even worse than we realize? Our misguided empathy impugns our character, suggesting we are also inclined to those same acts. And what does that say to people in our orbit, especially those who have been victimized? It communicates that we are not safe people. It creates barriers.

Strike a healthier balance

If we genuinely believe that sin’s exposure is ultimately good for the church as a whole, we need to move beyond misguided empathy and embrace a more biblical and healthier view—a more balanced perspective. So what does that mean?

Embrace the goodness of public rebuke

To call the public disclosure of sin good sometimes feels uncomfortable. It’s not good in the sense of being praiseworthy, or that the behavior of so-called discernment ministries should be lauded. Sin is grievous. Heartbreaking. We don’t celebrate it.

But even so, the disclosure of sin is a good and necessary thing, especially for those who serve in a public capacity. Platform does not exempt us from discipline and accountability—it amplifies it. After all, those who become teachers are subject to stricture judgment (James 3:1). And “those who are sinning rebuke in the presence of all, that the rest also may fear” (1 Timothy 5:20 NKJV).

Public rebuke is good for the one who sins, as its aim is to lead a person to repentance. But it is also good for those of us who witness it. It builds the kind of gospel-driven safety that misguided empathy erodes. And it encourages us to consider our own weaknesses.

Watch your life closely

We are all tempted to sin, without question. But we are not all tempted to sin in the same ways. This means you and I have different areas where we need to watch our lives closely. My temptations are not yours, nor are yours mine. This means it’s simply not true to say, “But for the grace of God go I,” especially when responding to news of a public Christian committing (typically) some kind of sexual sin because there’s a good chance that we aren’t. (And despite the book’s title, lust is not every man’s battle.)

This also means that we need to work at having people in our lives who really know us. Who can ask any questions they want about every area of our lives. Who encourage, correct, and rebuke us when we need it. People like this are a gift from God. But it takes time to find time to find them. And it takes a safety founded in the gospel for those relationships to truly flourish.

Pray instead of posting

When someone we esteem sins, it’s okay to say nothing online. In fact, it is usually better when we don’t. Instead of posting, pray. Pray for genuine repentance. Pray those harmed would find healing. And pray that God’s people would pursue holiness to a greater degree as evil deeds—and in some cases, evildoers—are purged from among us.

Photo by Alex Shute on Unsplash